The 10th season of The League of Extraordinary Dick's is officially at the half way point. With the addition of an extra game this season, there is a nice even split to the season now. A good place to check in on the state of the league so far. This season has everything from players on a record-setting pace, rising stars, and SO MANY INJURIES! Let's see how each team has fared so far.
APPAREL DIVISION
STEEL CITY - Coach Chris Shackelford and Steel City are off to the best start in the L.E.D. this season currently sitting at 6-1 (2-1). Steel City is flying high on the backs of stud WR's D.K. METCALF, DIONTAE JOHNSON, and COOPER KUPP, who is currently on pace to break Calvin Johnson’s single season record for receiving yards (1,964). Coach Shackelford also plucked RB CHUBA HUBBARD off the waiver wire and is now reaping the benefits of Christian McCaffery's absence. What's even more impressive is Steel City has enjoyed this success while they were less than 100%. They can expect RB SAQUON BARKLEY and TE GEORGE KITTLE back within the next two weeks. They'll need the help to protect their lead against a tough Apparel Division.
PLAYER HATERS - What a shock! Coach Matt Douthit and Player Haters has one of the best lineups in the L.E.D. (end sarcasm). Statistically, the best player in L.E.D. history is loaded with talent up and down the roster. With the sudden breakout of offensive hybrid and NFL dinosaur CORDARRELLE PATTERSON, the Player Haters are enjoying the benefit of a staggering four running backs in their lineup most weeks. This stable of RBs is lead by AARON JONES and JAMES ROBINSON. KAREEM HUNT was also contributing heavily until his most recent injury. If the Haters can stay healthy, a week 12 showdown with Steel City could decide the winner of this division in 2021.
CHICKEN LITTLE FLEA FLICKER – Coach Sarah Meads has her work cut out for her over the next half of the season. The previously 3-0 Chicken Little Flea Flicker squad will take on the Team Sports division over the next four weeks before heading back into division play. She’ll need to rely heavily on receiving starts TRAVIS KELCE and JUSTIN JEFFERSON for points, as well as JAVONTE WILLIAMS to finally take over the lead role in Denver. But one factor to keep an eye on: CLFF’s 3-0 record within the Apparel Division. Holding these crucial tiebreakers over the division could help CLFF sneak into the playoffs. They’ll just need some help from QB DANIEL JONES to steal some wins while waiting for QB RUSSELL WILSON to return.
DIRTY SKIVEYS – The L.E.D.’s sleeping giant. Coach VanSkiver had to tinker with the roster a little bit and overcome some close losses. But since starting the season 0-3, this team has erupted to become the L.E.D.’s highest scoring offense by averaging an impressive 115 PPG. This offense is led by the three headed rushing attack of JONATHAN TAYLOR, D’ANDRE SWIFT, and DARRELL HENDERSON. QB DAK PRESCOTT is also on a mission to show the league he is healthy again as well. Finally, this team is also getting as significant boost from their special teams. Taking the homer approach worked out for Coach VanSkiver as K TYLER BASS and D/ST BUFFALO BILLS are consistently putting up big numbers for this team ever week. Coach VanSkiver is going to have to overcome the 0-3 division record to start the season, but trust me when I say NO ONE wants to play Dirty Skiveys right now.
LODGE DIVISION
HUGE HEFNER – No team in the L.E.D. has exemplified what it means to be snake-bitten more than Coach Russ Alkire and Huge Hefner. But as other members of the L.E.D. from past experience: you can’t keep Big Daddy down for long. Despite being without 4 of his top 6 picks, CHRISTIAN MCCAFFERY, CLYDE EDWARDS-HELAIRE, CHRIS CARSON, and LOGAN THOMAS the 3-time champions just keep finding a way to win. It isn’t always in dominating fashion, but Coach Alkire will take them how he can get them. It certainly helps matters that LEONARD FOURNETTE has finally taken over the lead role in Tampa Bay and MATTHEW STAFFORD is thriving in LA. Coach Alkire just needs to hold out a bit longer to get healthier. Then look out, L.E.D.!
ONE EYED MONSTERS – The reigning L.E.D. champion raised more than a few eyebrows by going all-in on the Tennessee Titans on draft day. And while some of those risks didn’t pay off, the majority of them did. The league’s best RB DERRICK HENRY is on pace to break Eric Dickerson’s single season record for rushing yards (2,105). Additionally, RYAN TANNEHILL is thrilled to have his favorite target, AJ BROWN, back on the field. With Tennessee steamrolling some of NFL’s best, is almost a guarantee that someone within this trio is going to put up big numbers. Not a bad gamble at all, champ. Throw in JOE MIXON and rising star TE DALTON SCHULTZ and Coach Jeff Hamrick should be able to keep pace and compete with the rest of the division for a playoff spot.
PEEPING TOMLINSONS – Leaving the draft, I felt that Coach Brendan Florian clearly won the draft and assembled the best roster. Fast forward 7 weeks later, I still feel that Peeping Tomlinsons is one of the more complete and well-rounded rosters. The Tomlinsons aerial attack led by QB JUSTIN HERBERT and WRs DAVANTE ADAMS, CEEDEE LAMB, and EMMANUEL SANDERS, is the strength of this team. AUSTIN EKELER is getting it done in the ground as well as the overall RB3. The Tomlinsons are another team to keep an eye on going forwards as they currently have a tie-breaker advantage over One Eyed Monsters and 4th & Schlong. The Tomlinsons can compete with Huge Hefner for the division title if they can brush off a little bad luck and do well in their divisional games. 4TH & SCHLONG – From what I can tell, Coach Kellen Williams and 4th & Schlong got the wrong end of the hype train and bitten by the injury bug. While QB KYLER MURRAY is making his case for NFL MVP, he’s not getting much help on this team besides RB DALVIN COOK and WR MARQUISE BROWN. WRs CALVIN RIDLEY and AMARI COOPER were supposed to be alpha dogs for their teams, but it just hasn’t come to fruition like we expected it to. Additionally, the loss of RB David Montgomery has left this team relying on backup RBs. Not one to throw in the towel, Coach Williams did improve this team by acquiring up-and-coming TE MIKE GESICKI. This team has the pieces to string together some victories, but they just need to live up to their potential.
TEAM SPORTS DIVISION
CAROLINA REIGN – Coach Cody Luck and Carolina Reign jumped out to a 3-0 lead over the Team Sports division to start the season and have continued their winning ways for the most part. QB TOM BRADY is the L.E.D.’s QB1 and continues to defy the odds and orchestrate one of the most potent offenses in the NFL. WRs CHRIS GODWIN and ANTONIO BROWN have benefitted from Brady’s stellar play and both have had productive years under the Reign. RB ALVIN KAMARA continues to be one of the more productive and consistent RBs in the league. Finally, it appears that TE KYLE PITTS is starting carve out his production during his rookie season. While the starting line-up is pretty well rounded, this team has primarily benefitted from having few injuries. Coach Luck better pray that injury bug stays away because there aren’t many good replacement options on the bench.
PEE IN YO CORNFLAKES! – I don’t know if it’s because Coach Zaino doesn’t have Facebook or what, but I feel like not many people are giving Pee In Yo Cornflakes! the respect they deserve. QB JALEN HURTS is the L.E.D.’s QB2 on the season. They have two top 10 WRs in MIKE EVANS and MIKE WILLIAMS and two top 15 RBs in NAJEE HARRIS and NICK CHUBB. And just for the laugh of it, they have TWO of the top 3 TEs in MARK ANDREWS and DAWSON KNOX. This team has already exploded for 150+ points this season and could be an absolute terror on the competition if they get in the playoffs. They very easily could take this division on overall records alone.
GRIZZLY ADAMS BEARDS – Coach Drew Riley and Grizzly Adams Beards is another roster in the L.E.D. I would consider one of the more complete ones. Through the draft and several trades, this team is led by MVP candidate QB LAMAR JACKSON and two of the L.E.D.’s top 3 WRs, TYREEK HILL & JA’MARR CHASE. RB EZEKIEL ELLIOT is back to putting up his usual big numbers again now that QB Dak Prescott is healthy again in Dallas. Finally, there Coach Riley traded for TE DARREN WALLER, who is sure to return to form now that the Raiders offense has been rejuvenated. Looking back over the season, Grizzly Adams Beards is a better team that their record indicates. If they had won their week 1 contest vs Laces Out!, Grizzly Adams Beards would be the #5 seed in the current playoff projects.
LACES OUT! – All the “beginner’s luck” that One Eyed Monsters had last year? Well, they must have used it all up. After blowing up for 140 pts week 1, has been a tough start to Coach Chris Bowen’s L.E.D. tenure. Not only did Laces Out! lose staring RB GUS EDWARDS just days after the draft, QB Patrick Mahomes picked this year to start turning the ball over…a lot! The injury bug took out a red-hot TE Rob Gronkowski early in the season. Add that together and it’s been really tough to find points for this team. However, that should change starting in week 8. Coach Bowen recently acquired RB Antonio Gibson and WR Keenan Allen. Throw in the prospect of Gronkowski returning this week and Laces Out! should be able to turn the ship around.
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